Ship Minion: Captain, quickly the ship is destined to hit an iceberg! 
 
You: The correct respose would be- Iceberg, quickly you are destined to be hit by the captain!
 
Ship Minion: But sir...
 
You: If you ever question the Captain again, he will terminate you.
 
Ship Minion: Why are you referring to yourself in the 3rd person?
 
You: *flick red switch trap door opens*